compassion?!

i was actually planning to blog abt the 5Cs in my other blog but i decided against it. its mainly negative remarks and can be a pretty bad way to impress myself upon those that i work with. i think i might stop blogging there. =(

compassion. jesus had it, peter and paul had it but do i really have it? i had heard praises from friends and people that i know when they found out that i am in the nursing line. changing diapers, wiping asses... actually, what is so noble about doing these dirty jobs? i don't think its noble at all and it doesn't really take a whole lots of compassion doing it. at least thats wat i feel.

compassion in my view it to feel like the relatives of the patients, to be able to feel for the patients and to put myself into the shoes of the unwell. me however had not been able to do so. i love the 'doing' part of my job. inserting catheter, taking blood, putting up transfusion, giving meds and knowing its effects... i enjoy seeing how an initially ill-looking frail person turn well and energetic on discharge. but is that compassion?

my compassion might be there for last stage cancer patients who are dying soon. my compassion was to pray for their relieve to hasten so that they may be 'well' soon. my compassion may be for the bed-ridden and totally helpless patient which is constantly ill regardless of how much transfusion or replacement therapy we are 'forcing' into her system.

my compassion for the seemingly well ladies that are mainly in the ward for their emotional and social issues? NONE. my compassion for the loud mouth, UPDATE ME! UPDATE ME! relatives? NONE!

number 1- we are not running a social charity half-way house. just because you DO have some chronic illness and you just hated the sight of your son/spouse/daughter-in-law, you complaint of constipation/headache/giddiness and get warded? while you stay, you order others around as if you are paying (but ahem.. the taxpayers are!) thus the staff are you slaves?! when you are told to go home, you cough up new complaints and new investigations ordered. needles are your best friends and you wonder why you have no drips or blood taking on somedays. but when you have to be on drips and tubes of blood extracted from your veins your complaint why always poke you. blah blah blah... THESE ARE THE REASONS I TRY NOT TO BE TOO FAMILIAR W FREQ "fliers".

number 2- stop coming to the counter and scream UPDATE ME PLS. i don't give a damn if you are the patient's sister's daughter's boyfriend who happens to be working in the same company as me or the patient's cousin's granddaughter's husband. or even if you are the 4th son of the patient- who happened to had given birth to 13 kids in total but is actually cared for by 1 unmarried daughter. or maybe you are the 1 of the 40 grandkids that the patient has, not counting the numerous other related kids that came just for the sake of running along the corridors! the Dr had updated the MAIN SPOKEPERSON. so go and ask him/her! what the hell do you mean by saying "but that person does not really understand what is going on" huh?! not sure then change the main spoke person can? get someone that has the influence and the understanding to talk to the Dr lar. why torture us? and the most interesting shit is... when i tell you "the Dr had already update the main spoke person (the son/daughter..) this morning it will be best if you check with them" the reply was "BUT I AM THE SON/ GRANDDAUGHTER, CAN'T YOU GIVE ME JUST A BRIEF UPDATE? I DON'T LIVE WITH MY UNCLE SO I HADN'T HEAR FROM HIM." omg! keep your family shit at home behind close doors! who really care if son A hates daughter C and their families are at loggerheads? i am just a nurse. I NURSE THE PATIENT! but seemingly these days we have to nurse the patient's family and even extended family too. why?!?! why do they love to tell us their emotional struggle on caregiver stress or even stress from the maid?! *faint* my norm is i will gently re-enforce the main spoke person policy while giving the ___(insert relationship here)___ a run down of the patient's condition. actually if we are strict with the confidentially cause, with regard to the JCI we should NEVER do that and if we must shouldn't we then request for the person IC too? haha... so much of the BLACK and WHITE... nursing deals too much with the GREY!

why do i blog abt compassion today? cuz recently i was so pissed by somebody (whom in my view is just another "I CAN SPEAK ENGLISH WELL SO I AM BIG SHOT" but actually looks and behaves like a totally no manners idiot. i strongly suspect he is just another taxi driver and engages in illegal betting sort of guy). so pissed that i wanted to shout back into this face and scream can't you see i am busy!? here take my name and complaint for all that i care. (which i didn't of cuz! i even said thank you at the end of the 'talk')

**just to clarify...i have nothing against taxi-drivers and i don't look down on them of any sort. just that sometime i think they love to talk big that's all. otherwise, they are just as important as anybody in singapore. considering the amt of taxi trips i make weekly...they are damn important lor...=P**